My Daughter Zuul is a Pretty Little Boy, Part Deux

Okay. So like I said.  I don't mind if people can't tell Zuul is a girl when I take her out dressed like a little boy.  I mean, how is anyone really supposed to know this beautiful little baby is a girl?

 BUT, come on.  I actually went out of my way to take her out in something girly today.

This is a purple onesie and purple heart leggings.  I know the bib has blue on it, but it's blue flowers.  Anyways, we stopped at a gas station, a FedEx center and Jai's work and at all three places I was told was a handsome little boy I had!  I mean, come on people.  I am trying here, you have to give something back!

I will make an exception for the person at Jai's work because she was Chinese and the Chinese language does not have words for "he" and "she" so often time they have trouble picking the right pronoun even when referring to grown adults, so that is totally understandable, but what what the excuse for the lady at the FedEx??

I refuse to glue a stupid bow to the top of my daughters head just so that people will know she is a girl, but it is really awkward all the time.  

God bless the brave, strong people who simply ask, "is it a little boy or a little girl?"  And although it is a terrible double standard, let's be clear, it is not uncommon for a child dressed in boy clothes to be a little boy or a little girl, but when you see that kid in the pink dress or the heart legwarmers, she is going to be a girl.  I have yet to see a parent dress there infant boy in a pink dress. 

How to Raise a Geek

How to Raise a Geek in Eight Simple Steps

Step 1: you need an awesomely geeky moniker.  We went with Zuul.

Let's be honest, there isn't much hope for Zuul to escape geekdom.  After all, her name comes from a pop culture Ghostbusters reference.  One day, while laying on the couch thinking pregnancy was the worst idea I ever had, I told Jai that his crap lousy baby was making me sick (we have seen Blades of Glory too many times and now use crap lousy way too much) and he said "There is no baby...only Zuul."  Since we didn't know if the baby was a girl or a boy, and because we had to call it something, Zuul stuck. 

Step 2: Books, lots and lots of books

There are a ton of really great kids books out there to help you introduce your child to geek culture. 

First, to teach them all about SciFi:



Jai makes sure to explain to her what was happening in each episode pictured



Then, because every good geek has to know their tech: 



Goodnight Ipad, goodnight doom.  Goodnight bird launching over the moon.

This one is great for introducing them to topic in science, math, and myth:

C is for Caffeine and R is for Robot

 And, because it's never too soon to start SAT prep:

But where, you ask, is Star Wars ABC? 

Well, to be perfectly honest, I was super geeked when I saw that on the shelf, C3PO and R2D2, what would be better right?  But my glee quickly faded as I saw that A was for Anakin, and I'm sorry, but as far as Zuul will ever know, there were only 3 Star Wars movies, and Anakin wasn't in any of them.   And, well, if that had been the only issue, I might have still gone with it, but there was just too much episodes I-III for me to allow my child to read it.

Step 3:  Dragons, lots of Dragons

Zuul's room, which is really just a pack and play in the corner of our room, is filled with pictures of dragons and unicorns and castles.  When she has a room of her own (when finally find a job and we buy a house which could mean she will be in our room until she's 13), it will be decorated in dragons.



The pictures currently in Zuul's "room"



Part of the reason we decided to have a baby when we did (I was 9 months preggo when I graduated law school and studied for and took and passed the TN bar with a newborn at home) was that we wanted to make sure she was born in the year of the dragon.  Yes, we are so geeky that having our babies Chinese zodiac be a dragon was pivotal to our child having decision. 







 

Zuul and Scorch

Step 4: Encourage Geek Appropriate Careers

So far we have helped Zuul narrow it down between Rocket Scientist and Super Hero.  It's never too soon to decided a career path.  College admissions can to competitive, so best to start preparing now.



Step 5: Teach Them Space is Awesome



Make sure you give them lots and lots of time in space.  Zuul spends time sleeping in space, playing in space and generally fighting off alien invasions.  She loves to watch the planets go by and attack the rocket ships.  When she is older we will continue to teach her to love space through shows like Star Trek, Farscape and Firefly, because space cowboys are the greatest.

Step 6:  Surround them with geeky toys

Okay, so Jai bought these Dr. Who actions figures for himself on a trip to New York City.  But I am sure when Zuul is old enough he will be happy to pull them down off the shelf and play with them with her.  What is cuter than a two year old running around with a Dalek yelling, "Exterminate, Exterminate?"  Nothing.  Absolutely nothing.  

The ugly doll is another must.  They are soft and cute, but just a little weird.  What better way to teach your little one that different and weird can be cool.  I saw a baby hugging one of these years ago and I know my baby had to have one (or three).  

And, in case you feel we have been neglecting the super hero/comic book aspects of raising a geek, Zuul has cat woman and batman barbie dolls waiting for her when she is ready for that little girl doll stage of life.  (That is of course assuming Daddy lets her take them out of the box).

Step 7:  Make Sure They Have Lots of Time to Think Deep Thoughts

Zuul likes to spend a few hours contemplating really deep thoughts every day.  You know, really absorb that calculus we've been reviewing, or figuring out how to accomplish faster than light speed space travel.  Making sure you give your little one lots of time to solve the problems of the universe is important.

Step Eight: Model Geek Behavior In Your Home

Studies show time and time again that children learn best by parents modeling appropriate behavior.  Your baby looks up to you, so make sure to be as big of a geek as you can at all time.

We always make sure to be as geeky as possible at every opportunity.  So, just follow these easy steps and you too can raise and awesomely geeky kid.  Don't worry, one day they will thank you.



Profile of a Geek: Jai

JAI

Giving me a grumpy face for taking too many pictures in a train ride to NYC several years ago.



My husband Jai grew up in rural Maine (think mountains, moose, and hour and a half long drives to the movie theater).  He may have been a geek from birth.  Family lore is that at the tender age of three he would watch nothing besides his Star Wars movies.  Now this may have had something to do with the fact the you could not get cable in rural Maine in 1986, and dishnetwork did not exist (to my knowledge), or it could be that he was just born to be a geek. 



If he wasn't born a Geek, by the time he left for college he was a card carrying member of geeks anonymous.  During his high school years he was the founding member of his high schools Audio-Visual Club.  Now, I thought the AV club was just something that only happened at TV, like 28 year olds in high school, but not only was my husband a member of his club, it was his idea to start it.  Like any good geek of the late 90's he played Magic, The Gathering with his friend (that's singular of course, because it was not cool to be a geek in the late 90's) and talked about whatever Anime was currently on the top of their awesome list.  Sadly, this was far before the days of digital cameras, and I don't have a scanner, so I cannot share any photos from these early years, but he did get his senior picture taken with this really big sword:

Zuul added for scale.

 and I think they says it all.





Zuul wants to be just like Daddy

In college, he met one of my very best friends Renee, and they continued their geeky journey together.  Anime started out as their vice of choice (subtitled of course) and they quickly moved on to Dungeons and Dragons, Computer based RPG's and Bad Scifi movies.  Renee then introduced him to me and 6 months later he moved to Michigan to mold me into my geeky self.  



Jai, Me, Renee and Cook at the Lafayette Cemetery.



Now of course, when we first met he was trying to impress me and I was in my Goth/Punk phase, so he pretended he was really into that too.  But deep down in his heart he was a geek and was plotting to turn me to the dark side. 

At Michigan State University, where he got a B.S in Science (Okay, Microbiology, but I like to just say he does science for a living), he met a whole new band of geeks.  He stayed up till the wee hours of the night playing Marvel, a superhero based Dungeons and Dragons for those of you not in the know, and he begged me to play with him.  I, of course, refused, for two reasons.  First, I have a feeling I would have been treated like this:

And second, I don't know if you have ever played with hard core gamers but every gaming session pretty much ends up like this:



Also, I insisted that if I was a Mutant for his super hero game my only ability would be to turn purple, because I am a firm believer that not all X-men like mutations are going to be super helpful.  He insisted I would just die all the time and finally stopped asking me to play.

After he graduated from Michigan State we moved to New Haven, CT so Jai could get his Masters Degree in Science from Yale.  He could not find a new D&D crowd there so he threw himself into video games, reading comics and sci fi TV.  He spent the next four years rewatching every episode of Battlestar Galatica, Farscape, Babylon 5, Star Trek, and Stargate, (SG1 and Atlantis),   playing endless hours of Ratchet & Clank, Elder Scrolls, Neverwinter Nights and Civ IV, and reading Sandman, The Watchman (before it was a movie), and pretty much anything super hero related he could find.  Some of these things he made me do with him, and I have to admit Farscape is a damn fine show.

Once we moved to Memphis in 2010, and finally had some extra money he begged to play World of Warcraft. He had always wanted to play it and after watching a few seasons of The Guild he really had the itch. So he spent the next two years Raiding and leveling up, which was great because it still doesn't have any D&D friends. Sadly, money got tight was we prepared to welcome Zuul into the world and Jai hasn't played WOW since she was born, but now he has a whole new little geek to play with and one day, when she's a little older he may just get that D&D buddy he's been longing for.

He's off to a good start geeking her up.  Zuul is only 4 months old, so we don't let her watch TV.  But Daddy is always quick to add "Except for Dr. Who."